The Answer to Our Problems

You all know that I am extremely skeptical about “science” in the area of commitment and fidelity because I believe that it is a social construct. Nevertheless, people continue to come up with ridiculous theories on why people cheat.

I’m a firm believer that if you are going to study why people don’t cheat, you should exam people that don’t cheat. This study got it only 1/2 right.

An Oklahoma State University research has been given $349,175 to study the pair bonds of the prairie vole – one of the few monogamous mammals. According to the article

[Dr. Alex] Ophir plans a series of studies to examine how hormones in the brain regulate social affiliation, parental care, territorial behavior, and memory.

“For instance, we will specifically investigate the control of a particular hormone, vasopressin, in brain areas known to influence pairbonding, and ask how the brain functions to maintain monogamous bonds, and promote child care from fathers. We will also ask what influence paternal care has on offspring brain and behavior development,” said Ophir.

Maybe it’s me, but I don’t think that a rodent can help explain why humans cheat. Rodents don’t have Internet websites that cater to cheating (nor do they have Facebook). Rodents don’t have mores (to my knowledge) that influence the decision to cheat or not.

I’m not the biggest fan of quoting comments of people on the Internet, but I think I’ll make an exception here. Here’s the sole comment in response to the article.

Excuse me, but a vole isn’t a human and to fund such research instead of funding research that involves human health and development, while claiming that is what you are trying to fund seems that someone had to dump a bunch of money and had no better ideas.

We have millions of people that are suffering from disorders that need funding and they are looking into voles and “pair bonding.” How about we take that money and fund why Johnny is not learning like the rest of his class or the reasons why people spend their hard earned money on idiotic studies instead of helping those that need help very badly

Source: NewsOn6

I thought suing your husband’s mistress was ridiculous, but this takes the cake.  Here’s the story: A Toronto woman (man those Canadians love to cheat) and mother of two was having an affair.  Her husband eventually found out about it when he noticed a bunch of long-distance calls to their residence.  He then left her.  And now she wants to sue the cell phone company for $600,000. Smh.

The woman alleges that Roger’s Wireless improperly terminated her phone bill under her maiden name and combined it with her family account.  The defense is that the woman was behind in her payments, so they canceled the defunct account and added it to one in which they were making payments.  The company also left a voicemail instructed them that they were going to terminate her personal account.  Also the company put all of the family accounts together once the husband decided to add more services to the account (phone, TV, Internet).

According to the article:

Nagy is deeply embarrassed and ashamed about what happened. “It was a mistake,” she said of the affair. “But I didn’t deserve to lose my life over it.”

After her husband left her and their two children, ages 6 and 7, she was so distraught her work performance suffered and she lost her job as an apartment rental agent that had paid her almost $100,000 until she was let go in Oct. 10, 2007. “The plaintiff wept uncontrollably at her workplace . . . and became incapable of performing her employment duties,” reads the statement of claim. Nagy says the employer was aware of the situation and that she was receiving medical attention.

Let’s get this straight.  YOU decide to sleep around on your husband.  YOU decide not to pay the account in your name.  And now YOU want to sue because your husband found out about it.  You’ve got some nerve.  You don’t deserve to have your life ruined because of this? Why not? Being an adult is about accepting responsibility.  It’s called liability.  If you are bold enough to cheat, you need to face up to the consequences.  If you want to blame someone, then look in the mirror.  $600K is not going to get your life back.

Source: Toronto Star

First off, I’d like to thank Gov. Mark Sanford for clearing up any doubt that I am eligible to run for governor.  I mean this guy is a certified class act.  Let’s examine the state of his life since last summer’s scandal.

Sanford has been censured by the House. His wife, Jenny Sanford, divorced him in March after penning a tell-all book describing their relationship. She’s now dating a Georgia businessman.

And Mark Sanford agreed to pay the largest ethics fines in state history for, among other things, his use of state planes for personal and political purposes.

The term-limited Republican, once considered a possible 2012 presidential contender, leaves office in January after completing his second term.

Meanwhile, Jenny Sanford has been a popular talk show guest whose political capital is rising. On Thursday she’ll be on Dr. Phil recalling the affair. And on Friday, she’ll be campaigning for state Rep. Nikki Haley in her GOP primary bid to replace Sanford and become the state’s first woman chief executive.

So after all of that you’re still meeting up with a divorced average looking woman from Argentina with two kids?  The post right before this was about a guy who ruined his life and wants to kill himself.  Why is it that Gov. Sanford is making weekend trips to Florida with the same woman that caused all of this drama?  I really don’t get this guy; he’s a Grade A douchebag.  He’s obviously learned nothing from this whole encounter which is kinda scary.

Source: NPR

Apparently DWade’s wife doesn’t ready blog because if she did, she would know that suing your husband’s mistress is lame. No woman can make your man cheat. Siohvaughn Wade claims to be suing Ms. Union on behalf of her 8 and 2 year old sons. Why she doesn’t blame Mr. Wade for failing to take responsibility is beyond me. It’s also beyond me why she acts like she’s never heard of an athlete cheating before. I know they’ve been together since HS, but still…

Source: Chicago Breaking News

Another day, another mistress writes a book about her love affair with a famous person.  Not much to this story here.  Former actress Carole Mallory discusses her relationship with Norman Mailer in her new book “Loving Mailer.”  Mallory also thinks that being the “other woman” gets a bad wrap.  She says

You have to understand with these famous men, they go after women, yet the press likes to make it appear that the women went after him

I completely agree that the person in a relationship (in most cases, it’s the man) is to blame.  But then she goes a little too far with her disdain for

how they [Tiger's mistresses] have been portrayed as oversexed sirens who lured the married sports idol onto the rocks of deceit

How exactly has the media treated Tiger’s mistresses like “oversexed” anything?  Were there any doctors or lawyers in the mix?  These weren’t exactly women you want to bring home to mom.  While no woman can make you cheat, knowingly sleeping with a married individual makes you trashy any way you cut it.

Source: NY Times

Some people obviously don’t know what love means. After the Iceland volcano eruption, many people travelling too and from the UK were stranded. What did they decide to do? Pull out their phones and sign up for Illicit Encounters, the UK version of Trashy Madison. One would think that they would call their loved one (or be thankful to be alive). If you remember, IE was the same website that people flocked to when they were snowed in. Man those people in the UK are cold…

http://www.prudentpressagency.com/modules/news/article.php?storyid=16707

Since when did family entertainment and TV ratings become mutually exclusive?  I’m only 25, so it’s not like I’m talking about the 1960s.  We had shows like Family Matters, Full House, Roc, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Boy Meets World, Saved By the Bell.  TGIF was the highlight of everyone’s week-old or young.

But now one  Jamie Jungers (one of Tiger’s h**s) and Michelle McGee (Jesse James’ h**) are close to getting a show for celebrity cheaters. (How ironic).  I’m sure Joey Greco is pretty upset, since catching Cheaters on film is his thing.

Anywho, we really need to reassess our priorities.  I watch cheaters because it is a legitimate attempt to provide entertainment and address a serious issue.  This proposed show, however, is a da** circus.

America is upset about all of this mess going on, but where’s the action or pushback???

Source:  TMZ

In less than a year Rihanna and Chris Brown had domestic dispute that made international headlines.  Mark Sanford cheated on his wife, Jenny, with a woman in Argentina.  Additionally, Kim Kardashian finally ended things with her on and off boyfriend Reggie Bush.

Now ALL of these women are back in relationships.  Moreover, they’re in relationships with the same types of guys that they were with beforehand:  powerful men.  Rihanna is now dating baseball player Matt Kemp.  Jenny Sanford is now dating businessman Clay Boardman.  And last Kim Kardashian is now dating Spanish soccer sensation Cristiano Ronaldo.

I cannot even begin to imagine that pain and anger that Rihanna and Jenny felt after being internationally humiliated.  I know that they want to move on with their lives, but this all seems a bit too soon.  You’ve got to give your wounds time to heal.

I find it hard to believe that neither Rihanna, Kim, nor Jenny still have feelings for their exes.  And now they are only complicating things by mixing old and new emotions.  This is a HORRIBLE foundation on which to build a relationship.

I’ve been in a relationship where I wasn’t fully over an ex and it was harmful to my then-girlfriend.  Depending on how strongly you cared for that person and the circumstances of the breakup, it can take years before you fully get over someone.  And if you’re not over that person, you’re more likely to give him/her another chance if when they come back around.

I wish all of these women well in their new relationships.  I hope that they find the love and compassion that they seek.  But I just have this gut feeling that none of these relationships are going to last.

If I can say one thing about AlterNet, it’s that they have interesting article.  Today they ran a story entitled “8 Reasons Marriage Doesn’t Matter.”  The article instructs women that have not found “Mr. Right” to not give up hope.  This, I think, is admirable.  However, the site goes TOO FAR when they start trashing marriage as if to say you’ve got to be crazy to want to get married.  For example:

[Discussing marriage]  The idea of anyone spending that kind of money on anything they can’t get out of the rain in makes my head spin. $20K? On a party? What are you, Keith Moon? If you want to be the center of attention for 20 minutes before being locked down for life it would be cheaper to just rob a liquor store.

The more romantic options for that money would be to set it aside and every time you have one of those thin-ice days, when you’re looking at each other like the enemy, go away on a dirty weekend. Nothing recharges love like a change of scenery and lots and lots of body fluids. It’ll work whether you’re married or not and can be a form of time-released relationship life support.

That’s exactly what’s wrong with the world now.  We think that random hookups will solve all of life’s problems.  Locked down?  It’s only being locked down if you approach it that way.  If you’ve settled, you may think that way.  But there’s absolutely nothing like having someone that you can completely trust 24/7.  I’ll take security over a heightened risk of contracting AIDS.

What every happened to being responsible?  And adult.  With all of this Botox and open relationships crap, it’s like everyone wants to live in Neverland.  Grow up for crying out loud.

Source:  AlterNet