I saw “No Strings Attached,” starring Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman, yesterday.  The movie is about two young adults that have a “friends with benefits” relationship.  Kutcher wants to pursue something serious, but Portman is doing her residency and only has time for an unattached, sexual relationship.  Here’s my take on it.

The Good: The movie is pretty funny.  Since the movie is Rated R, they can get away with more crude humor.  Also, there is diverse array of characters.  We get to know the background on every character (except for Christopher Bridges, aka Ludacris).

The Bad: The movie is somewhat long (or at least seems that way).  The movie slightly deviates from the typical romantic comedy formula in that there are two “I just can’t let you go” scenes.

The Ugly:  It’s a romantic comedy.  Guys really do hate these movies because they have the same storyline with different A-list actors.  They are easy money makers and that’s why Hollywood keeps pumping them out.

Takeaway:  If you saw “Letters to Juliet,” you’re only going up by seeing this film.

SPOILER ALERT: Kutcher and Portman end up together at the end of the film.

I do like the fact that there was a role reversal and the woman was the one resisting the relationship, BUT it still sends the wrong message to woman.  The movie misleads women into thinking that guys that are having their cake and eating it too are interested in pursuing in a serious relationship with that woman.  Like grandma always said, “why by the cow when you can get the milk for free?” I’ve seen that scenario play out time and time again.

I posted a tweet a few days ago about a new study which found that young couples today don’t agree on whether they are in a monogamous relationship.  The researchers at Oregon State University found that amongst couples 18-25, 40% had one person that claimed to be in a monogamous relationship and the other had no idea what they were talking about.  The researchers also found 30% of couples committed infidelity.

I felt as though this article needed to be discussed at length, so I wrote this post to clarify some things and provide my insight into it.

1. I’m not sure what the researchers meant by “couples.” Are they talking about couples that are just “cut buddies” (i.e. No Strings Attached) or a couple that holds themselves out to be boyfriend and girlfriend.  The perception/reality dichotomy is the oldest problem in relationship.  Guy takes woman on numerous dates.  Guy has physical relationship with said woman.  Woman thinks they are together.  Guy says “I’ve never told you that you were my woman.”

I find it HARD to believe that 40% of people in an established, “Facebook official” relationship are going to look the other person in the face and say “You never told me that we’re in a monogamous relationship.”

2. 18-25 year olds? I didn’t enter into my first (and only) monogamous relationship until age 24. People in college are just learning about their sexuality.  I am a firm believer that it’s a BAD idea to be in a monogamous relationship in college.  I’d have to give considerable thought to come up with a list of guys that I knew to be 100% faithful in college.

3. If the study is talking about a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, it only means that couples should make explicit something that has been presumed when you enter into a relationship: this is a monogamous relationship.

Again, I question the research here because if what the researchers are suggesting is that there is no monogamous presumption, they implicitly imply that there is a nonmonogamous (polyamorous) presumption.  And I don’t know of ANY guy that assumes his girlfriend is permitted to sleep with other men until they have a conversation that they are monogamous.

Source: USA Today

Women usually feel unattractive when it’s “that time of the month.” However, according to researchers, women are the most attractive to men when they are on their period; their faces look better, their voices are more appealing, and their pheromones are stronger. In short, if you are looking for a man, you’re best shot is to look when you feel like staying in bed.

This was one of the many things I learned watching The Science of Sex Appeal (2009)(stream on Netflix). The film focused on how our faces, bodies, voices, and scents attract the opposite sex.

Apparently the ideal woman has a waist that is 70% of her hips. Smaller ratios are perceived as even more attractive.

Similarly, our bodily conception of beauty revolves around thirds. So,for instance, ideal eyes would be one eye length apart.

The documentary is very interesting and I suggest that everyone watch it. There were a few things that I already knew like the number pairings equilibrium, but plenty that I did not know with respect to the role ovulation plays.

SPOILER: Money for men (provider role) trumps looks, so even if biology doesn’t work in your favor, you can still land a woman significantly more attractive.

Based on comments, it appears that Ashley Madison is STILL running their My Marriage Matters scheme. I told them to stop. I’m going to make them wish they quit while they were ahead.