Jul 302010

Weight A Minute: A Reflection on “The Figure”

I talked in my previous post about issues of weight in the Black community. Given the FIGURE I think it’s time we address this issue.

I believe that the Black community is at a HUGE crossroads. When my dad was growing up, women were put into two categories: sex symbol (Diana Ross/Pam Grier) and mom.

A great deal, however, has changed since my father’s generation. It’s now more socially acceptable to date outside of the race and today’s Black men have grown up with the expectation that their wives should be sexy. When my dad was growing up, women like Esther Rolle were cast as mothers. Now they have women like Essence Atkins playing mom. Naturally, Black men want to marry (and not just admire as a sex symbol) women that look like Beyonce and someone on the cover of King Magazine or the JET Beauty of the Week.

The problem is that most Black women don’t look like Essence Atkins. 80% of Black women are overweight compared with 58% of White women. The other problem is that Black women are often told (implicitly or explicitly) that there’s nothing wrong with being overweight. Just look at the most powerful Black women in the media: Oprah, Mo’Nique, Wendy Williams, Sherri Sheppard, and Tyra Banks. Tyra is the only one amongst them that is not overweight (despite Wendy Williams’ numerous liposuction surgeries). Now try to think about role models for White women that are overweight. All I can come up with is Susan Boyle. I also know for a fact that Black women expressly tell their daughters that there’s nothing wrong with being overweight (again because they grew up in a different generation).

Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with being a healthy average size. I’ve never heard of a Black woman being anorexic or bulimic and that’s certainly a good thing. But with all of the discussion on the broken state of Black relationships, I can’t help but notice that this discussion has been intentionally omitted because it is sensitive and hurts feelings.

I’m not out to hurt feelings, but I do know that silent problems don’t go away. I’m going to speak for professional Black men when I say that we would like to see Black women take control of their health. When you go to a non-HBCU for undergrad and law school, you can’t help but notice that you see White women running and/or lifting weights, but not Black women. I’m not talking to the people that don’t need to go to the gym (some people just have good genes). All I’m saying is that if you’re having trouble finding a man (even if you are in shape), it doesn’t hurt to go to the gym. Just look at Jennifer Hudson.

While women on all of those dating shows (The Bachelor, Flavor of Love, Frank the Entertainer, Chad Ochocinco) may have different complexions, they all have one thing in common: the women are all in shape.

Men nowadays want to marry a sex symbol. Looks and the ability to cook, clean, raise kids, etc. are not mutually exclusive, but if a guy has to choose, he’s going to go with looks nearly every time. Just look at that idiot that married Kendra. Speaking of Family Matters, what about Darius McCrary who married Karrine Steffans aka Superhead?

I love curvy women and in that respect, Black women have one up on the competition. In fact, seeing a curvy woman has the same impact on a man as doing drugs. BUT in order to look like Beyonce, you’ve got to hit the gym. Beyonce works out at least 5 times a week. And I promise you that if she stopped one day, she’d go from a 20 ounce to a 2 liter bottle. Your curves are a gift, and like all gifts, you either use it or lose it.

*Just check out this timeline of mothers on Black sitcoms and look at the correlation between size and time.