That said, many of the imperfect men out there who can’t hold down a “perfect” woman might need to become a LOT more self aware of their flaws which tend to, as you pointed out, be INTERNAL and suck it up that their girl that can give them most of what they want and put up with all their sh*t might just be the girl with the pretty face and a few extra pounds.

Too many black men have a little degree or some small-time job that they’ve been holding down for a while, and a nice looking face, maybe some skills in bed…and REALLY BELIEVE that’s all they need to deserve the best woman they see out there. All these women with children most of the fathers are BLACK MEN…so that means there are just as many black men with children as black women, yet such a large proportion of black men don’t want women with children? Serious hypocrisy there…where does all the better than thou attitude come from with these men especially when another big chunk of them are products of single parent homes or wards of the state???? They put their mommy on a pedestal but disrespect women who fit the same description…and aren’t bringing enough to the table for the woman they feel they deserve.

I know a guy right now who works and goes to school and looks very appealing to women, very ambitious yes but also lives with his mother who is illegal in the country and so he’s the sole breadwinner of the house. He basically has a readymade family situation except he can’t get sex out of her, obviously. The type of woman he’s holding out for is the christian, classy, professional, childless, slim, attractive, educated type that DESERVES BETTER than a blue collar dude still living with his mother and too broke all the damn time to do anything nice without sending his bank account haywire, and can’t even have a girl over for the whole night cause his mother is there! Why the HECK does a man like that think because he’s not a shiftless thug he deserves a girl who has a perfect life? He’s by far more attractive than the average guy, and has a strong mind, but he clearly has had it too easy with the women else he would realize despite his good points, his ass is a liability for any woman trying to move forward with a serious relationship leading to marriage if she has her life together and he is here playing husband to his mother and not able to get out of being her “man” ANYtime soon. Dating him is like being the side woman to a married man, all his resources and time are tied up and you lucky to get a little drop of what a normal girlfriend gets out of a normal relationship!

But you can’t lay it out like that no sir. Long as he has the looks, the in-school status, and the bedroom skills, he will always feel he can hold out for this girl of his dreams. He met such a girl once and was already entangled in marriage to a hoodrat he said he loved but that also was the way he got HIS papers to be legal in the country…and once again didn’t seem to realize his situation how he even came to this country and his station in life ensures that he does not deserve such a woman, because when she came along HIS imperfections stopped him from being able to be the man SHE needed in her life! She obviously didn’t need to stick around and wait on him to sort out his drama-filled life and the finalizing of the divorce. And he won’t admit it but he has such disdain for women who are not about education and getting ahead yet so-called “fell head over heels in love” with a ghetto girl without a GED or even a driver’s license! Please he’s not fooling me she was the only girl, no matter how good he looked, that was going to bother with a broke dude with no papers working cash only jobs to get by…she’s the only one he could get his papers off for FREE cause she hit the jackpot really in a guy that was willing to work and take care of her and looked damn good on top of it. Now he’s come up and trying to trade up. And I don’t doubt if he could get his hands on a white girl he would drop black women period like a bad habit cause he’s looking for STATUS and not a woman who is compatible and can put up with his sh*t.

But a girl that maybe isn’t the slim perfect thing and has kids, and may be just as educated as that girl, that WOULD understand and wait out his rough spots…he feels he can do better than so he stays single but trying to date/screw decent women while acting like he just isn’t ready for a relationship (even though he also advertised online that he was looking for a soul mate! So how is your ass not ready for one?) while most girls out there that fit what he wants don’t need to take up no broke ass dude who has to pay for himself and his mom and their little apartment and all the legal fees, and has no money left to spend on her or do anything.

A lot of these men are delusional and their good looks and demand by black women keeps them that way. It’s when they are used up and washed up they want to realize they are aiming too high for THEIR station in life. Some of them got the chance and dogged out girls who would have been great for them simply because they could get away with it as there were more girls waiting.

And then they wonder why black women in this country are so angry and hurt and overweight from all the emotional eating all the time. Look at what they must deal with, on top of a black man’s colour issues cause they might not care about race but they care about SHADE.